Boundaries Revisited






Boundaries are an essential component for any healthy relationship, not merely those seeking to rebuild a foundation of trust after the discovery of betrayal. Yet the subject of boundaries is often confusing, with misconceptions about what boundaries really are and how they can be leveraged for relational health.


In this webinar, Dr. Jake Porter will share his conceptualization of boundaries, providing a clear definition of what they are and how they are to be used for the good of relationships. 


Featured Topics

Get Clear on the Priority of Relational Safety

Dr. Jake positions the topic of boundaries within a larger discussion on the essential need for relational safety, especially after the trauma of betrayal. Utilizing his Couple–Centered Recovery Model, he will explain what relational safety is and why no relationship will heal and grow without it. 

Discover what Boundaries Are and How They Work

Many people think they understand boundaries, but in reality they mistake boundaries for rules, penalties, or demands. Dr. Jake will explain the surprising secret that makes boundaries powerful: the reality of choice. Properly understood, boundaries help individuals find clarity within their relationships.

Begin Developing Healthy Boundaries for Yourself

In the final portion of the webinar, Dr. Jake will share the ways he helps couples begin healthy boundary development. Giving practical wisdom and clear principles, couples will leave with the outline of a plan to set boundaries that empower them to choose their relationship over life's competing distractions.

From the desk of Dr. Jake...

If I had a nickel for every time I've heard the word "boundary" in my office, I'd be positioned for a very comfortable early retirement.


It makes sense why. One of the first things that betrayed partners hear after discovery — whether from a support group or a podcast or the pages of a book — is that they need to set boundaries for their own safety. And I totally agree! The problem is that very few people are ever actually taught what boundaries are, much less how to set and enforce them.


This is a big problem because the need for boundaries is real, and that applies to any relationship! Without boundaries, there can be no real intimacy, no real relational health. Boundaries make intimacy safe. They make lasting connection possible.


This is all the more true in situations in which there's been the discovery of betrayal and the shattering of relational safety. Couples healing from betrayal must grasp the ability of boundaries to restore a sense of trust, respect, and empowerment in the relationship. 


In this webinar, I'm going to share my definition of boundaries I teach to the couples I work with. Simply put, boundaries are a system of limits that protect relationships through clarity, containment, and guidance for mutual empowerment and flourishing.


You see, what most people don't understand about boundaries is that their real power resides in a mutual respect for each person's right to make choices. When I truly grasp this key, I unlock the potential for boundaries to radically transform my relationship for good.



Discover some of the most powerful insights Dr. Jake uses as he works with some of the most complex couple therapy scenarios out there. By applying his understanding of developmental neuroscience, attachment theory, and counseling psychology, Dr. Jake has helped numerous couples shift the dynamics of their relationships.  Learn practical tools for powerful shifts from Dr. Jake himself!

How do boundaries help create safety in relationships?

Dr. Jake will clearly set out the principles for relational safety and show how boundaries both establish this safety and allow it to grow. With particular attention given to the dynamics couples experience after the discovery of betrayal, Dr. Jake will describe the issue of safety utilizing insights from developmental neuroscience, attachment theory, and psychobiology.

What makes a boundary healthy or unhealthy?

According to Dr. Jake, boundaries are fueled by mutual respect for each person's right to choose. This is very counterintuitive for many, especially those who have been betrayed. Why should there by a focus on the "rights" of the one who did the betraying?


In this webinar, Dr. Jake sheds light on the truth about disordered boundaries and how they create a sense of false empowerment that actually has the opposite effect than is intended. Boundaries divorced from "choices" have no power to bring change to the deepest level of relational dynamics and keep partners seemingly stuck in distress and pain.

What do boundaries actually sound like?

The most positive feedback Dr. Jake gets when he teaches on this subject surrounds the real-to-life examples of boundaries woven throughout his teaching. From start to finish, Dr. Jake will provide examples of real boundaries so that participants hear what they sound like, as well as receive coaching on how they can most effectively be delivered.

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About Dr. Jake Porter

Dr. Jake is the Founder and President of Daring Ventures Counseling, Coaching, and Consultation. He is a national board certified counselor, professional coach, and expert in the fields of trauma and relational dynamics. He is the creator of Couple–Centered Recovery, a model that places the primary attachment relationship at the center of the recovery and healing process.

In addition, to his work as a coach and psychotherapist, Dr. Jake is an Assistant Professor of Counseling at Houston Graduate School of Theology, where he also serves as Director of the Doctor of Professional Counseling Program. He speaks often in many settings, and has taught and trained individuals around the world. 


Read more about Dr. Jake here.


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